Nov 3, 2025
Breaking Free From the Script: How to Live with Intention and Purpose
Sometimes it can feel like you’re just following a set path for your life, going where it takes you and doing what you’ve been told you should do. Over time, it might even feel like there’s no other option but to ride it out.
From the moment you’re born, your life is shaped by the values and expectations of your family, your culture, and your country. These are the beliefs you’re raised within — some you’ll eventually question and reshape, others you might carry with you without much thought. Some will bring you fulfillment and others will bring a sense of emptiness.
So how can you be more intentional about the direction your life is going, and reclaim the aspects that are meaningful without just going through the motions?
key takeaways
Align Actions with Personal Values: Living a meaningful life requires focusing on values that matter to you, not those imposed by others, and being willing to face challenges to pursue them.
Balance Pleasure and Meaning: A fulfilling life combines short-term pleasures with meaningful activities, which provide lasting purpose and satisfaction.
Reprioritize Life Domains: Reflect on under-prioritized areas, such as health, relationships, or personal growth, and take intentional steps to realign actions with your values in those domains.
CLARIFYING WHAT MATTERS
Personal Values for Life
One important step in pursuing a meaningful life is asking:
► "Am I doing what truly matters to me — or what others have told me should matter?"
When you reflect on what brings a sense of meaning and purpose to your life, you’re thinking about personal values. These are qualities — like kindness, curiosity, responsibility, or honesty — that you can choose to act on at any time. While values are usually all positive qualities, the ones that guide your life may not be the same as those prioritized by others.
You choose to live by certain values because they provide direction, especially in difficult times.
For instance, if you set out to go north because that’s important to you, you can keep that at the forefront of your mind even if you find yourself trudging through swamps along the way. Pursuing a meaningful life means you’re willing to sacrifice some immediate comfort to get to where you want to go. You have the freedom to turn back if the journey gets tough, but the personal value helps you willingly accept the challenges and helps you continue onward.
✧ Next Read! For more on how to keep showing up even when anxiety persists, read The Growth Mindset for Anxiety: Turning Struggle Into Strength.
FINDING SOURCES OF HAPPINESS
The Joy of Simple Pleasures
But should life be all purpose? What about simple pleasures?
A study published in the Journal of Happiness Studies explored this question by asking participants to engage in different types of activities. Some focused on comfort and enjoyment—like shopping or playing video games—while others focused on meaning, such as reflecting on personal values.
► Pleasurable activities produced immediate positive emotions, but the effects were short-lived.
► Meaningful activities didn’t create the same quick emotional boost, but they were linked to longer-lasting improvements in well-being.
Interestingly, participants who regularly engaged in both types of activities — those that were pleasurable and those that were meaningful — reported the highest overall levels of life satisfaction. Pleasure has its place. But to experience deeper fulfillment, we also need to pursue something meaningful — something to strive toward, even when it’s hard.
FINDING WHAT MATTERS
Exploring 10 Domains of Life
If you feel like you’re not living the life you want, it may help to move beyond the broad desire to be “happy” and look more closely at the specific areas of life where meaningful action can take place.
When important domains are consistently neglected, life can start to feel constrained or empty. That discomfort is often a sign that something meaningful is being overlooked. Making adjustments in how you spend your time, energy, and attention isn’t easy, but it’s necessary for moving toward greater health and satisfaction.
Consider the following domains and reflect on their priority in your life:
Health
Leisure / Hobby
Social relationships
Family relationships
Intimate relationships
Spirituality
Community / Environment
Finances
Learning / Personal Growth
Work / School
Now ask yourself:
Have I been under-prioritizing an important domain in my life?
What type of person do I want to be in these domains? (e.g. “I want to be the type of person who is kind, assertive, supportive, patient, cooperative, organized, etc.”)
What actions can I take that will demonstrate these values?
What are barriers that will keep me from acting like this type of person? (difficult thoughts, emotions, physical sensations, people, places, etc.)
What will I do when these barriers show up to remember my values and continue moving in a desired direction?
✦ Need Help? If you're struggling to answer these questions, start with Who Do You Admire? How to Use Role-Models to Overcome Anxiety.
MAKING SMALL STEPS
Put it Into Practice
Don’t wait to feel better before doing something that can make a difference.
Make a list of two or three things for each value that you could do within the next 24 hours to bring them back to life. Challenge yourself to engage in one of these activities, even if it’s small.
Pursuing a meaningful life can become about acting with this intention right now, even if there’s discomfort. You may find that you have more choices than what you initially imagined.
